Top Five Tau Threads
Top Five non-Tau Topics this Month
Kangaroo Joe is a long serving member and moderator of our forums. He currently moderates The Enclave (our off-topic section) and the Ork army board. Although he firmly believes it himself, the Jury's still out on whether he's really an Ork! Anyway, onto the interview...
(Q) What attracted you to this site and how have you found it so far?
A: Yeah, it's Rezzys fault theat I'm here. He turned up at my house two years ago, caned me into the ground with his Eldar, then told me in no uncertain terms I had to join this weird for um thing.....I did so. I remember my first couple of posts......one was telling people I liked the smell of motor oil and the other was a rant about how GW favours marines.....heh, you wouldn't get away with that now.
I like these forums. I tried Eldar Online and it all seemed too critical. What I like about this place is the relaxed atmosphere.....its more like a group of mates who meet at a gaming club and mess about. Its getting less like that now, but thats due to the size of the place (its impossible to know everyone the way I did back then) And the forum expanding is a good thing. Means more people are sharing the TO experiance, even if it does mean I have to put up with the shock of being told that someone doesn't know me that well......
(Q) Which armies do you collect, how big are they and how long has it taken to accumlate them?
A: Hmmmmmn....Orks. Greenies. The Waaaaaghmongers. Thats what I collect. Started off on Eldar. Lost a lot. Gave up. Went to Guard. Lost a lot. Gave up. Found Orks. Lost a lot, but it was funny......so I kept them. My army isn't that big (around 1700 odd points). It would be significantly bigger if I were to assemble and paint all those boxes of boyz I have upstairs.......I've been doing Orks for about 3, 4 years now....and progress has been sporadic (if that is even a word) with me buying random boxes when I have felt like it. I've tried various fantasy armies, but I let theme get in the way of effectiveness, and so lose a lot.......Don't think I'm cut out for fantasy.
(Q) Any advice for the rest of the community?
A: Yes. Don't take comments personally. If you want to slag off another race, or your race is being slagged off, make sure its all in good humour. If a mod tells you to do something (or more usually, to stop doing something) comply, cuz it makes everyones jobs simpler. Oh, and Karma Cookie to the person who sends Wargamer the best "Why I Love The New Necron Fluff" essay (Karma Cookie not actually given)
(Q) Why have you never picked up a second army? Applied your Orkiness to some un-Orkie race.
A: I have tried. Really I have. But then I just find myself thinking "This would look cool as a looted so and so" or "Hmmmmmn....If I had a mob of boyz that unit would be biting choppa". Even armies which superfically seem similar to the boyz such as nids just don't cut the mustard. Although I am keeping an eye out for when Xenos Hunters get here, cuz I have a tihng for the Inquisition, but Grey Knights (while excessivly cool) aren't really me.....I don't want created best of the best uber trained, nor holy fanatics. I want gritty, rag-tag but experiance troops, backed up by an Inquisitor and his personal guard (I intend to use Mordians for this porpoise) and maybe inducted guard......Mostly as something for my boyz to get shot by.
(Q) Who's really king of the internet: You or David Hasselhoff?
A: Net high iraqi (Internet Hierachy) goes:
Me, who does the telling - - - - - - Tau Online, who I respect loads and whose advice is important
(Q) What has kept you in the hobby? And what has kept you on TauOnline for so long?
A: What keeps me in the hobby? Well, its something I enjoy. I see no reason to stop. Its not affecting my health (apart from that time I got high off poly cement by mistake and tried to lick my friends terminator chaplain) And what keeps me on TO? I love this place. Why, you thinking of replacing me?
(Q) It's an easy one to answer, but you might as well make it clear which beer you prefer whilst playing and whilst chilling. Name it, support it and let us know why it's the best.
A: Hmmmmn....Holsten Pils if I can get it, if not Carlsberg, Fosters, Brahma.......anything with a nice taste thats not cheap crap/franco-belgian (Sorry guys.....I just HATE your lager)
(Q) How DID you get a job as a mod?
A: You know, I have no idea. And neither does TO. However, now I'm here and as he's accidently placed me above the rules, he can't actually sack me. So, kids, heres an important lesson. If you look like you've always been there they just assume you work all day in your office, as opposed to say, starting bar fights and using the fax machine to repeat copy hundreds of pictures of your undergarments...
(Q) How did you get the name: Kangaroo Joe?
A: I was playing a game of halflife and was getting the smeg knocked out of me. Then I picked up a jump pack and started jumping every where, and no-one could hit me, and my mate who was on the same server just says "Oh, look at Kangaroo Joe there....."
(Q) What's your favorite Ork unit?-- Cheers!
A: GROTS!!! They are so funny....
Rumours: New Eldar Codex Round-up by 42
As we've been reporting in previous issues, the Eldar are getting a new codex soon. Below are the changes that will be seen with this new release:
- Farseers will be able to take a Warlock retinue
- The Autarch (new HQ option) well be able to select from a wide variety of aspect wargear, including ranged and close combat weaponry, movement options (i.e Striking Hawk Wings) and helms such as a mandiblaster
- Ranger minimum squad size will increase with an option to upgrade them to Pathfinder's too in any eldar army
- Points decrease for guardian jetbikers
- Wraithgaurd will now be toughness 6, and the Wraithcannon will wound on a 2+ with a roll of 6 being an instant kill
- More exarch options to Howling Banshees, Striking Scorpions and Fire Dragons
- Harlequins can be taken in a squad between 5-10 with the option to upgrade a leader to a Death Jester
- Cost Reduction for Vipers to 45pts
- Dark Reapers will have a 3+ armour save and also drop in points cost slightly
- Wraithlords will increase in cost, have more weapons options but also suffer from Wraithsight
- Fire Prisms will have two modes of firing the Prism Cannon for anti-troop and anti-vehicle uses
- When two or more Fire Prisms are close together there may be increased weapon damage bonuses
- Phoenix Lords have better stats and abilities and will cost roughly 200points
- Other Special Characters available will be Eldrad Ulthran and Prince Yrial
Fluff: Clarity or Innocence by MalVeauX
The battle was near it’s end, after the peak of a confrontation where a Tau outpost came under assault by a small strike force of the Ordos Malleus. There was a notion that an old settlement deep beyond the Tau’s understanding had too much potential power to be left unattended, so they were sent to destroy it and any guarding it. The Tau of course, paid no mind to the artifacts as they do not speak to the Tau mind. Many veterans of the Malleus fell to the pulse attacks but many Tau also fell to grenades and fear stricken lines that faltered after an Assassin would leap and bound around, slicing limbs and stabbing between armor plates and joints. But through the carnage, eventually only a Malleus operative of the Inquisition remained.
The psychic waves of energy kept the Malleus operative hidden during the battle, and he approached the final lines of the Tau as the strike force was falling to its knees. Sanctuary barriers held fast around him as he chanted the prayers. The Malleus operative was sure that his prayers would hide him from the wicked xenos. The Tau had no idea what to make of this fellow, as his hair and cloth around his intricate armor danced for no apparent reason, but they could see him clear as day. Finally the order was given and a single monat XV8 attacked the operative. The short ranged missile locked in and tore the operative into large chunks that landed with muffled thuds on the parched ground and the mysterious wind dissipated.
”We may not have understood what we saw, but it was easily vanquished regardless.”
Rant: Cadians, Templars and Chaos, oh my! by Wargamer
Does anyone remember a time when Chaos had Cult-boxed sets? When Salamanders and Iron Hands got their own squads, and when we had close to a dozen model ranges for the Guard?
I would wager some of you reading this do not, and it's a terrible loss to the hobby. Games Workshop, in their infinite wisdom, have decided that people don't want versitility. All Marine players are going to be Ultramarine or Black Templar, all Chaos will be Black Legion, and all Guard will be Cadian. Gone are the days when you'd run afoul of the Mordian Iron Guard, or the Steel Legion, or the Raven Guard... no, Games Workshop doesn't do that anymore.
I am sick to the back teeth of seeing the same army repeated over and over and over again. This isn't the players' fault, not always at least, it's the workshop's. Their utter lack of intelligence and forsight with LoTR has left a big hole in their profits, and they are making the 40K players suffer for it. Thanks to Aragon, Legolas and Gimli, we've got to endure Codex: Cadians and a Black Templar codex with no mention whatsoever of other Crusade Chapters.
Of Cadians a lot has been said already, but look at the Templars. There was a perfect oppertunity to tell us about how Crusade Chapters work, and to give mention of others who believe in nothing but constant offence. But no, they focus on Templars alone. What's more, word has it that Codex: Angels of Death will return. Apparantly, the Blood/Dark Angels aren't important enough to warrant seperate codices anymore. I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't have successor Chapters anymore either.
Now before someone brings up Space Wolves; forget it. The Space Wolves are an exception, they are a founding Legion who have stuck to their guns and damned the rest. Templars are the same, to a degree, but as they are a successor Chapter it only makes sense that others would follow in their footsteps. The least they could have done would be to remake the Armageddon Codex, and give the Salamanders their rules back. No, Templars have to glory-hog, and give us something new and unique... a Marine army focussed on assault. Now where have I heard that before?
Games Workshop used to give us so much. By the end of Third Edition alone, there were so many Marine lists with rules it was mind-boggling... as well as Codex: Space Marines, we had Black Dragons, Black Templars, Blood Angels, Dark Angels, Flesh Tearers, Imperial Fists, Iron Hands, Lamentors, Legion of The Damned, Raven Guard, Relictors, Salamanders, Space Wolves, White Scars and no doubt more that I have forgotten. Rules for at least fourteen Chapters. Fourteen seperate army lists... and then all the "repaint" Chapters.
What do we have now? Two, with three more coming. From Fourteen-plus to Five...
Then there's Chaos. Admittedly, the Chaos lists were bulked together into the Codex itself, but will that remain? Personally, I doubt it. The Marines may have Traits, and the Guard have Doctrines, but that's not the same. Tacking cheap extras onto a list does not give you a new army. The Eldar too are losing their Craftworld lists, and rumours have been abound, though thankfully largely dismissed now, of the Dark Eldar vanishing. Soon it truly will be the horror that many have feared: Codex "Marines" and Codex "Not Marines".
Games Workshop have taken from us Blood Bowl, Dark Future, Dragonmasters, Epic, Gorkamorka, Gothic, Heroquest, Inquisitor, Man O'War, Mighty Empires, Mordhiem, Necromunda, Talisman, Warhammer Role Play and Warmaster. All have vanished from the shelves of GW, and many are all but extinct now save for the occasional appearence on eBay. So many game systems ignored for the sake of three... and LoTR won't last.
This is, ultimately, what we have to expect now from GW; pointless updates, badly-planned releases, and the guarantee that everything we've bought will be made obsolete in four years when 5th Edition comes out.
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